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Monday, September 26, 2005

Mothers are ever so cute.

Especially fanatically jealous ones who
attempt to rope in their sons to help 'keep watch'.

Yea. Like I'm ever going to sell my Father out.
Heheh. Although I'll have to admit, my loyalties
can prove to be slightly malleable when it comes
to money.

Gimme, gimme.
Show me the green.

For you, I'll bust my spleen.

--------------------------------------------------------------

And I do come from a long line of jiak kan tangs*
meeting up with a former Primary School mate has
confirmed this.

We are Kan Tangs,
We are one.

English's cool,
Chinese drools.

We'll kick you ass,
because we're the best.

We are Kan Tangs,
English's cool.


Everyone spoke in English in my primary school,
so needless to say, it was a bloody culture shock
when I ended up in my present school.

People couldn't string a sentence together without
inducing colloquialism,
polysyllables when spoken, would earn a glare
and an occasional

'Stop being such a fucking show off!'

When for 6 years of your life, you've been
trained to manipulate the English Language
fluently, and the language becomes to you,
what a paint brush is to an artist, it was a real horrible shock.

What would a painter do, once he's lost his limbs?

He is nothing. No more than a shell of what he once was.
Instead, he adapts.

Learning to adapt to speaking in Mandarin,
loud vulgar and crass. English was shunned
except during lessons, where it unsheathed with stunning effect.

Oratorical Competitions came,
and quite naturally, for glory of the School, I joined.
Not for the present one, mind, I have no love for this school,
but for glory of my alma matter.

I'll show this bunch of fools,
the poseurs, the one who act cool, the one
who tried to emulate but failing terribly the art
of being an English Helicopter.
Neither here nor there, instead choosing to cover their
speech with slang and heavy accents to mask their impotency,
their lack of skill and finesse.

Quite expectedly, I won.


Throughout the next 2 years,
I would attempt to revolutionize,
I would attempt to change.

I cast off my cloak,
and came, gleaming with brilliance,
speaking English, loudly and with such pride.

Occasionally, I would still revert to Mandarin of course,
if not for the benefit of myself, then for my friends-acquaintances,
whose capabilities were so clearly ailing.
When they so politely requested, that I did not complicate things
and instead spoke to them in their native tongue.

I gladly obliged,
but still I had worked hard to make it known,
that in terms of linguistic ability, I had reign supreme.
It might not be reflected Academically, but that was the fault
of sloth and not my incapability.

I had worked hard to make it clear that
I could not be challenged, and that fellow aspirists
should know their place. I had cemented my place
in notoriety.

Unrelenting and unabashedly, I had endured through
the countless teasing, and insults of being able to
command the English Language and had instead
began insulting anyone found butchering it.

I had become unrelenting in my affections with the language.

Now, after having reached the apex in this level,
probably even this school.

I once again find the same story being repeated,
the same sort of people from 2 years ago.
Butchering the English Language,
stupid and dense.

Even less complex than an ant.


Who will rise to the challenge step up to the mantle?
Who will take my place in this crusade?

Or are we all doomed to this vicious cycle, where
the fools and the peasants, whose only excuse is their stupidity,
continue to butcher and whore the English Language reign supreme?

I plead with thee,
be my Arthur, come and claim the sword.

It is only the trick of the eyes that blind you,
the stone is no more as solid as the air.

Come claim the sword,
I've grown too tired to continue.

You'll find it surprisingly easy,
supremely satisfying,
claim my crown, I'll only give it too freely.

It just takes one.
Then, another revolution.

Just one.

13 comments:

Darthsid said...

becca:
*blushes*
Fwah! And to think I missed you out on my blog babes list.
Damn, if I ever.

I'm going to have to link you big, babe! heheh..

Jin said...

May I be given leave to speak what I will?

Theatrics!

Jin said...

Man, you've stroked so much of his ego, I want a slice of the pie too! Haw-haw-haw.

potpourri said...

Dude, you can come and get it jiggy with me anytime. ;)

Anonymous said...

Ah. The demerits of studying in a neighbourhood school when you've been abit of an anglophile. :(

James said...

Pretty much the same situation we have here in my school. No one's gonna be my apprentice, I expect. Kinda true huh, how HPPS churns out chinese-dud dudes. Today during the CLB oral examination I spotted at least a few people I remember from HPPS already. The thing is, they appear proud they're taking CLB. Hell, I think if I did, I would be too.

Darthsid said...

hejin:
Oh Fair Maiden,
Life Is But A Stage,
Is It Not?
We Are But Mere Actors In This Grand Play,
Fair Lady.

becca:
Muahahahaha!
Like I said, how could I EVER forget linking you as a blog babe!
*Slaps self in the face* Bah!

a crunchy green apple:
Oh. My. God.
You did not just say that.
*melts away in orgasms* Heheh...

nna:
Pshaw! And to think, my teacher only saw fit to give me an A2 for my essay.

james:
Bleah. It's a bloody disgrace, what's there to be proud about?

James said...

Well, at least I won't have to memorise as many phrases as other people. CLB sounds like great fun.

Anonymous said...

i love to talk in chinese and write in english.


kan tang kan tang! :D..

-weining

Wt said...

Sid: DO i finally hear you admit that taking CLB is such a shame??? darn, you never do admit that in school do you? Heh...

By the way, A2 is probably the highest she WOULD give any guy in our class...so be thankful...I guess..Of course with the acception of Mr. OYH, which in the case IF his English was actually up to anywhere near our standards he would be able to pilfer that A1 right from beneath our noses...

Pfft...looks are always an advantage with those *ahem* (how should i put it) teachers who love guys in uniform...is there a term for that? "Uniform-philic???" I'm sure there is a specific term for that...Ah what ever...

Darthsid said...

james:
Yea, I guess. But I still its bloody shameful taking CLB.
I mean, come on, you're fricken' Chinese man. Bah!

P.S. We don't memorise any phrases man. It's just Compo and MCQ.

Weining:
Heheheh.. Kan Tangs Unite! woot!

t.h.y.:
My ego doesn't allow me to. Besides man, I have a damn rep to maintain ,yea?
Admiting weaknesses would just be shameful, dude.

And bleah! She didn't have to go broadcast it though. Damn, damn, damn!
If Suk Wai could reach our standard [well, mine because I'm better ;)],
i'm damn sure she'll gleefully agree to giving out that A1. Bah! Or is it because
she can't stand losing out on the bet she has with me?

Wt said...

Sid: Bah...what ever...at least my English isn't sub-standard, unlike the majority of our class...Bah...

Darthsid said...

t.h.y.:
Heheh. *Grins*

Don't worry man, us omni-potent beings must stick together, eh?