Crazy Stalker Bitch Strikes Again!

Background info: Crazy Stalker Bitch, is a Sec 2 girl in my school who I was introduced to me by the girl (A) I was wooing at that time and we met only for that one time, with that girl I was so enamored with. After a few months of courtship, I was told by (A) that crazy bitch who was A's best friend, that crazy bitch was, well, crazy about me. That resulted in my courtship's failure and the subsequent collapse of any semblance of a relationship that (A) might have had with me.
So naturally, I was quite peeved at Crazy Bitch already, because
i) I could not remember who the hell she was, having met her only once.
ii) Anyone crazy as crazy as crazy bitch should be feared like as one fear syphilis.
iii) I really didn't know who she was. (It turned out that it was due to (A)'s bragging about me which resulted in crazy bitch's crazy behavior.)
and here was this crazy bitch claiming all sorts of feelings of affection for me. Man, what a crazy bitch. She was crazy enough to stalk me, one day during the Javelin trials, which lasted all the way till 6.30 pm. Good thing I had a friend with me, both for my protection and as a witness for the crazy bitch's behavior.



Well, people.
You know you've got it made when you're a pimply 15 year old
and you still have stalkers.

Well, the last time that I had any form of contact with this
stalker of mine was 2 months and 29 nine days ago.
When I had received three messages, while sleeping, in the space of 20 minutes
each of them sounding more desperate then the previous and well,
went along the lines of something like this:

"HeY.... I KnOW My Frens distur you jus Now....
DoN't Take it seriouSly OkAY?"

Followed by:
"Did you REcieve My Msg Jus noW? I'm Soreeeee
I'm really soreee"

and:
"I know that I'm just an Unattractive Bitch!
I also know that you think I'm an Unattractive bitch!
If you think so, why don't you just tell it to my face?!"

Waking up the next day and discovering these 3 messages.
I was literally scared shitless.
I've read the books, I've seen the shows,
I've known all along that psychotic and deranged people
can be like that, but never in a million years had I envisioned that
one of them would be obsessing over little old, innocent me.

Sweet ole' me, arrogant, big headed, and pimply faced me.

I was literally sweating in my underpants, unsure about what to do.
Then the phone beeped again.
And again.
And Again.

A full 4 times before the messages stopped coming.
Pleading for my forgiveness, apologizing.
Each one sounding more desperate then the other.

I didn't really know what to do.
What would have been the diplomatic choice of words?
What could I say to such a crazed girl of 14?
What would happen if I said something she did not like?
Does she know where I live?

In the end, the ways of honor truth and not putting up with the shit
of crazy bitches prevailed.
I replied with a message that said something to the effect of:
"You're crazy I'm not. This sucks. Piss off."
(Of course, I sugar coated it and tried to be incredibly subtle about it. I am after all, a nice person.)

And she did piss off,
and we didn't talk anymore.
She stopped stalking me and I couldn't be any happier.
(Although she DID spread some nasty rumors about my 'nice-ness' in school but I couldn't give a shit.
My reputation was so solid that the words of one crazy unkown girl would not be able to dent my rep)

Then, yesterday it happened again.

The phone beeped again.
It was her.

"hey dick. lets called it a truce. i heard from
XXX dat u say i start a rumour saying u lyk me. 4 ur
info, i am not dat stupid 2 start a rumour dat involves me!
u should noe dat. 4 gdness sake u r a 16 yrs old guy. tink
lyk an adult. i also didn't say i lyk u wholeheartedly. i juz
see u as a role model.so don't make assumptions."
Message copied verbatim.

Apart from the contradictions,
the bad spelling, the hop scotch playing punctuation.
I must say. She really isn't stupid.
Although I must say, how your memory does play tricks
on one, when one acts like a complete dumbass.

So, in light of her obvious intellectual capability,
I decided sarcasm would be real smooth.
Besides, the arrogance dripping from the message
called for it.

So I replied:
"Yes, yes.. As you wish..
Whatever you say, oh omnipotent one..."

And then,:
"haha.so lame."

She doesn't even have the intellectual capability of a monkey.

Oh why, oh why?
God, why?
Why don't you just strike me down with lightning now?
Crazy, Ugly, Dumb.
Why me?
*bawls*

Note: I'm only 15. Single Girls (not the crazy kind) apply now!