Hey, Pretty Boy.

'Lang Zhai! Lang Zhai!' (Cantonese for pretty boy)

It's been a damn long time since I've heard anyone use that term
on me, and bloody hell, what an ego boost.

Well, particularly when it's done during a particularly mundane
and boring math lesson, when we're supposed to be doing 'revision'.

Having one of the class belles, calling you over to her table
while your half falling asleep, depressed and pissed off,
to compliment you does particularly wonderful things for the mood.

Imagine sitting in the back corner of the class, half falling asleep,
then having a babe signal frantically to you, beckoning you over to her,
then having her say,

'I think you're absolutely and fantastically shaggable. Wanna shag?'
'Hey, I just want to tell you that you're pretty.'


Absolutely fantastic,
What isn't fantastic is when you're bloody caught off guard by such a compliment,
by someone so unlikely that the best reply you can come up with is


'Huh? What? Pretty!? Uh-huh...'

doing nothing to disguise the pride that's swelling up inside of you,
not really registering the compliment, klutzing instead of maintaining
your composure and your normally slick and controlled demeanor.

'Well, actually it was my friend who told me, we were discussing you then she
told me that she thought you were pretty.'

Woot! Why might girls be discussing little old me, while in their little old cliques,
during Chinese class? Especially since I've taken to appearing as like an asshole
to people I don't interact with on a daily basis.

Hmm.. Especially, little old, anti-social, never turn up for social events,
never acknowledge/greet acquaintances, terribly lippy me, plagued with
bad skin condition and all.

'What? Me, pretty? Pshaw! You must be kidding! Who in the right frame
of mind would say that!?'

'Well, she said something about your eyes... double eyelids... And no, I can't tell you
she told me in confidence.'

'I demand that you tell me! Tell me who your friend is! *guffaws*'

'Naa.. Can't say.'

And true to word, no amount of heckling would make her reveal her mystery friend;
in fact the only clue I had as to who the mystery friend was, is the fact that she studies
at 4C's Chinese Class, where they were discussing moi.

Well, in an attempt to ferret out the mystery friend, I went to consult
the belle's good friend who -was in her own words- 'PMS-ing',
the conversation that ensued was even more of an ego boost;

'Hey Suk Wai..'

'What!? I hate guys! Guys are all jerks! They all suck!'

'What.. I'm not nice? How can you say that? That's really hurts, you know?'

'Well, it's true! All guys suck! Only gays are nice. Are you gay? If you're not, I'm
not talking to you!'

'Okay, okay... Get a grip, man! You know I'm not gay.'

'Hmph. What d'you want?'

'Aye, d'you know which girl might've told Cindy that I was pretty?'

'Well, alot girls have cause to say that you're pretty what..'

Zing!
Heh.. My god. Was I ever feeling smug.

'Well, d'you know which girl from Cindy's Chinese Class might have told her that?'

'Erm.. I don't know, we study in different classes. Let's see *goes on to list girls' names*'

'Crap, I can't tell who might've said so. Nevermind, thanks.'

'GUYS SUCK!'

Well, well, well.. What do you know?
Being called pretty might not the idea of cool, for most guys,
but seeing as that females are into the whole New-Age Sensitive Man thing,
I consider it to be a compliment of the highest order.

So, mystery girl from 4C's Chinese class.
Come forward and thou shalt take you gently into sweet embrace,
suffocating thy doubts about thou's character and charming the proverbial
pants off you, so that thy self is lost admist my attempts at deception and your
senses make you fall deeply and wildly infatuated with this, 'pretty boy'.
Heh...

*Smug*

To further enhance my day,
I'd just found out that I'm getting an award for
'Outstanding Contributions To The CCA' or somesuch nonsense.
Fantastic. I'm going to have to return to school on Awards Day,
waste one day sweating and nervous like mad to go on stage to receive some plaque.

The best part? Jealous friends who come up with all sorts of excuses,

'My teacher sucks...'
'Aiyar.. I also don't want that plaque/to come back to school on Awards Day.'
'Yadda, yadda, yadda, I'm so competent but I didn't get that award, which means
my teacher actually thinks I suck but I don't. At least I think I don't. Do I suck?'


And then rubbing it all over their little faces, because they get so bitter that
they'll bitch to any and everyone about how unfair it is that he didn't get the
award, yet

'Nair mind, I also don't want that award... Yadda, yadda, yadda, it's not fair...
I should get the award... But I don't want it.'

Oh please, CRY ME A FUCKING RIVER. You suck. Deal with it.
Not going to have my day ruined by a whiny bitch, the simplest way to
deal with such jealous, bitter souls, is to laugh in their faces, tell them that they
suck and should face up to facts. And get a life.

Because they suck.
Even their teachers think so.
So, go on now child, go into a corner and cry, but stop your bitching please,
it's time for a little tough love, friend or no, you've got to admit that you suck and just
shut up.


Oh yea, did I mention I was going up on stage on Awards Day to collect a plaque,
in recognition for 'Outstanding Contributions To The CCA', along with all the other
bigfucks in the Uniform groups and what not. Hmm.

Smug.

Compound that to the fact that the the good looking guys -who normally do not
particularly take an interest in other people's affairs- have started asking questions
about my relationship status and whether my girlfriend is 'chio' or not.

And the advent of the babes starting to socialize with me,
greeting me cheerfully, asking me to sit with them, asking for my opinions
on their relationship woes, etc.

I'd say right now, life was going damn well.

'Cept for the fact that prelims start tomorrow.
And I'm damn worried for my exams this time round.


Oh well, I've been called pretty, am getting respect and recognition among the
female populace, am getting recognition by my peers, am getting recognition by
my teachers and've been called pretty.

Well, I may be tired as hell,
but hey,
life is still pretty good.

And being tired isn't going to stop me from being smug.
Oh yea.